I’ve started on a new project recently. At first I was hesitant to talk about it. I still think that caution is in order while discussing it because if I use the wrong words , well, certain words seem bigger and louder than others and tend to get stuck in the forefront of attention, hiding the real meanings underneath.
As for the title, I knew there was a T word somewhere that would hit upon the idea. I’m not terribly familiar with this word, though using it in a search did pull up some interestingly relevant links. On the wiki page they say that “Transpersonal experiences may be defined as “experiences in which the sense of identity or self extends beyond (trans) the individual or personal to encompass wider aspects of humankind, life, psyche or cosmos”. -Walsh, R. & Vaughan, F.On transpersonal definitions. Journal of Transpersonal Psychology, 25 (2) 125-182, 1993
Well then, that works for me. The article goes on about how that applies to the field of psychology. So, if you’re in the market for a psychologist who might be able to integrate your spiritual life into therapeutic practice, this might be a good keyword to look for. Very interesting. I’m not an expert. I just stumbled on the word this morning.
At Ra’s suggestion, I’ve been visiting and getting to know as many different neteru as I can, one at a time. It hasn’t just been talk. I’ve been receiving a small piece of each one’s energy. I think it’s much more polite the way I’m doing it rather than to try to fill my stew pot with bits of them, as the old magicians talk about in the Coffin Texts and the Book of the Dead. Those references always made me kind of angry. How I receive their energy will be left to your imagination.
The thing is that I’m finding a lot of value in the project. It is very transpersonal. When I close my eyes I can feel the lines of connection that I’ve been forming, like sitting at the center of a web. Each one I’ve met so far is very different, and each one is beautiful in their own way. I don’t have to wonder why someone would want to worship this one or that one and hold them above all others. I’ve seen why. They’re becoming more than just obscure names written on a page.
This doesn’t mean I’m going to set up altars to each one myself. Just because I can see why they are worthy of worship doesn’t mean I’m obligated to do it myself. It just creates a point of understanding with the Name in question and also with those who follow them. At this rate, my list of “beloveds” is going to get very long. That doesn’t mean they’re all happy to see me. One didn’t seem to like me that much, but he wanted to be heard, so I listened. That’s part of the deal.
Many of them are ones that I haven’t had much experience with before. Several times one would show up and I’d have to play a guessing game to figure out who it was. I do look them up afterward, but I don’t really know who is going to show up ahead of time. That’s probably a good way to do it to reduce bias ahead of time. Sometimes the experience matches the description, and sometimes it doesn’t. More often the experience emphasizes an aspect that I might have overlooked if I read about them first. I know why Hapi is called “the Father of the Gods.” I know why I can feel the memory of the Nun just below Ptah’s green skin. I know that Djehuty is far more powerful than his quiet nerdy appearance would suggest. I know that I can learn a thing or two from Montu. (Where are the goddesses? I seem to be meeting the gods first for some reason. The polarity will probably switch after awhile.)
There are a couple reasons why Ra set me on this task. One is for healing. It’s like a soul retrieval quest. I have been broken in typical spirit-worker fashion. When you go back to glue the pieces together, it’s not uncommon to find that a few are missing, or that they have crumbled into dust altogether. Each god contains a tiny bit of something that I need to fill in the gaps. I must humble myself before them and be receptive, or else it doesn’t work. I am Hem-netjer, a servant to all of them.
The other reason is that the network of connections is something that I need on an instinctual level. Both of my divined Fathers are kings. What is a king other than someone who builds connections and ties it all together? It is someone who listens and cares for many different voices, making sure that each one is heard. It is someone who somehow manages to bring those voices into harmony. I’m not a literal king, but I can work on building those skills.